Decide

May has felt incredibly long.

In between starting an introduction course to psychology, running @100daysoftryingitonce, giving a talk and workshop on the project, leaving my role, working my ass off and landing something new - I'm only finally catching my breath now, 10 days into June. 

Everything along the way was a decision - some well thought-out, others not so much but the thing is, we GET to decide. All actions are decisions, which means we have a choice AND a responsibility, if not to anyone else, we owe it to ourselves to choose what makes our hearts sing. 

You really don't need anyone's permission or validation. 

The phrase 'choose what makes you happy' is so overused but try fucking applying it to your life and you'll learn that it isn't the easiest thing to do. It means giving up people and places, time and things you hold on so dear to. But I promise, whatever you're picking up is far better than what you've left behind. 

I can't believe how long I've left it up to others and 'life' to decide for me - the time wasted thinking 'things will happen when they're meant to'. Then I grew the fuck up. Things happen because I made a conscious decision - to stay up working till midnight over watching another episode of Bojack Horseman or Suits, to not let others walk all over me, to know my worth and not be afraid of losing clients or people just because I chose to stand my ground.

The thing is, we have to constantly decide. It really isn't a one-off magical fairy thing. Things will not be okay after one great big decision. In fact, you probably have to work your butt off to reach what you're after but that's always better than someone's who's just going along for the ride. 

So, you decide.