to be continued

I find myself in the same place almost a year later. 

Believing in the best, fearing the worst.

Overwhelmed, feeling like I've not done enough.

Breathing but anxious.

History repeats itself until you learn.

My head and my heart don't get along. I've been trying to get them to believe in the same things but my head is always ready for flight even when the heart wants to fight.

But my hands, they just do what they need to do. They type, they lift, they bake, they clench, they hold, they pack - even when none of me feels like a part of it. 

I find myself in the same place almost a year later. 

Leaving again. Beginning again. And as much as my head and my heart sometimes still stir up a storm in me, this time I am trying to dwell less on history and be better at the present - to be believing, enough and breathing, continuously.